going downhill fast: November 2011

Saturday, November 26, 2011

cat nap

normal ketchup apologizes as this post is clearly not up to our usual, high standards. our reader(s) deserve better and our entire staff will redouble their efforts going forward. that is all.

New	24 Hours	48 Hours	7 Days	Snowbase
63 cm	72 cm	80 cm	111 cm	135 cm
25 in	28 in	31 in	43 in	53 in
Total cumulative snowfall	* Snow depths are measured at Pig Alley Weather Station - 1650m eight days

New

24 Hours

48 Hours

7 Days

Snowbase

63 cm

72 cm

80 cm

111 cm

135 cm

25 in

28 in

31 in

43 in

53 in

Total cumulative snowfall

* Snow depths are measured at Pig Alley Weather Station - 1650m

eight days

Friday, November 18, 2011

"The fact that we are here today to debate raising America’s debt limit is a sign of leadership failure. It is a sign that the U.S. Government can’t pay its own bills. It is a sign that we now depend on ongoing financial assistance from foreign countries to finance our Government’s reckless fiscal policies. … Increasing America’s debt weakens us domestically and internationally. Leadership means that “the buck stops here.” Instead, Washington is shifting the burden of bad choices today onto the backs of our children and grandchildren. America has a debt problem and a failure of leadership. Americans deserve better."

hmmm, who said it?

h/t skiergary

i knew bernie fine...

...bernie fine was my junior high gym teacher. and bernie fine is no jerry sandusky.

update: fine not fine. sick. gross. gone.

~~update:~~ ~~boeheim: i'm not paterno~~

~~update:~~ ~~former coaches, players~~

science fiction*

"Obama is operating on a whole other level here where we can’t even follow his logic, and that can be scary at times. It’s like if some sort of primitive person — a West Virginian, perhaps — saw a surgeon doing an operation. He’d think the surgeon was harming the sleeping man by cutting in to him, when in fact the surgeon was helping that man. And that’s who Obama is — a smiling man with a knife that we’re a little bit scared of. But don’t worry; he knows what he’s doing."

"Many believe that Barack [middle name omitted because it's racist to draw attention to] Obama is just a regular person who puts his pants on one leg at a time like the rest of us, but this is fallacy. In fact, were you to witness the miraculous way in which Obama puts on his pants, your brain would hemorrhage trying to comprehend it, and you’d die."

*actually, satire

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

catvertising

watchy

“…It’s moments like these that make me want to quit blogging and tweeting, and instead find a less complicated way to communicate with the world. Like throwing leaflets off my roof, or tattooing random thoughts on stray cats. Except I’d have to shave the cats first so I could tattoo them, and when their fur grew back you wouldn’t be able to see the blog posts I’d written on them any more, which would totally suck. So really I’d need to tattoo those hairless, sphinx cats, except that their wrinkles would probably cover up part of my writing whenever they sat down…so if I wrote “I’d pummel Hitler with rocks!” it would just look like “Hitler rocks!” and then all these hairless, suspected-nazi cats would get shot. Then later the gunmen would examine the dead cat and actually see that they were mistaken, and then they’d have to live with the guilt of killing an innocent cat who did not think Hitler rocked at all. So to keep the cats safe I’d have to make tiny sandwich boards for them to wear around with my blog posts written on them. It’d be hard to comment on though and there would be no spam control, so probably by the time you found one of my stray, sandwich-board cat posts it would be covered with badly scrawled viagra adverts…” 2008